On Sunday mornings @ the Tap, we’ve been going through the Lord’s Prayer. This past week, we looked at what is probably the hardest line of the Lord’s Prayer for us to pray: “Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.”
A number of people came up to me after the service - One person said that she was moved to forgive someone after almost a decade of harbouring resentment. Another person said that he’s never been able to forgive himself for something he did, but feels like he can now pray and be honest with God about it. And still another person sent an e-mail to tell me that it might have been the most personally meaningful sermon she’s ever heard, suggesting that if I started a blog on it, she’d write a comment. So viola, here’s the blog!
It’s obvious by all the responses, that there is something to this thing called “forgiveness.” What is it? What is it about forgiveness that we have such a hard time grappling with? Why is it so difficult sometimes to truly forgive someone?
In case you missed it, it’s on the podcast, but a few quotes from Sunday to serve as food for thought:
· Forgiveness is not the kind of thing you keep count of, because if you’re keeping count, well then you’ve never really forgiven and forgot!
· Jesus’ last words on the cross were “It is finished” or the Greek word “Tetelestai” which was used as a financial term back then to announce the final installment - the ultimate payment. It is finished. You are forgiven.
· Sin is not only doing the things we know we shouldn’t, but also not doing the things we know we should. And as hard as we try, we can’t avoid it…we sin. And worse yet, we normalize sin… it becomes part of our lives. As I’ve said before, we don’t commit a million sins; we commit the same sins a million times.
· We need to realize that at the starting-point of everything is the immense, undeserved love and forgiveness of God. And having been forgiven, God thus gives us the freedom to love and the ability to forgive. God has already forgiven us a debt so mountainous that beside it any person’s wrongs against us shrink to the size of an anthill.
· The person who suffers the most when we do not forgive others is ourselves. To forgive is to set a prisoner free, and when you do that, you discover that the prisoner all along has been… you.
Do you agree or disagree with these points? What are your thoughts on forgiveness?
delicious
digg
reddit
technorati
I think forgiveness - true,
I think forgiveness - true, honest and complete forgiveness - is one of the greatest challenges we have, at least it is for me. However, as I listened to Albert’s sermon, and when instructed to think about someone I needed to forgive, I had difficulty identifying anyone.
One day, my spouse just walked away from our marriage, without indicating why or even hinting that they would ever do such a thing. They actually left the country. I was both angry and hurt. Suddenly, I had become a single parent and I had no idea why and no opportunity to try to understand their reasons and maybe convince them to stay. In the months and years after, the Lord kept telling me to forgive, and He told me that same thing each and every time I prayed to Him for help. I remember I worked very hard at forgiveness one particular month, and while it was a struggle, the Lord showed His happiness with me with some very obvious blessings. I knew I was doing better, and I knew I was doing what He wanted me to do. I wonder about myself though, and whether or not I have TRULY forgiven my ex-spouse for doing this. Since I am writing about it here, have I forgotten enough to completely say I have forgiven? I’m not sure.
A Catholic friend once told me that I could feel that I had forgiven if I was willing to literally bow down and wash the feet of my former spouse. I would be willing to do that, but I still have doubts if even that is adequate. Even though I would never be willing to marry them again, my ex-spouse is welcome in my home, they can ask me for anything they need, and they will always be represented with honor and love to our child. Always. Under all circumstances, I am friendly, kind and respectful toward them. But is that enough forgiveness? I’m not sure.
What I question about myself is whether I can ever believe or feel or act in a manner of true forgiveness. Much worse things have happened to much better people, so why can’t I completely let go? What Jesus suffered goes way beyond my experience, and while I call myself a Christian, why can’t I be more like Christ? I’m not sure.
So what did I take away from the sermon? I took a fear that I am not doing enough. I took a fear that I might be blocking true forgiveness within myself, maybe because of pride or maybe because it makes me uncomfortable. If that’s the case, it’s also why I couldn’t think of someone to forgive. Maybe if I get past those things, maybe I can ask myself the same questions that Pastor Albert asked and be honest with myself. I think this journey is not yet complete and that there is so much more I have to learn. This sermon hit me really hard. I am seeking to be the kind of person the Lord wants me to be. Maybe it’s just the lesson He wants me learn, because it is one of my greatest shortcomings. I’m not sure.